You Won’t Believe These 6 Bullet Points Regarding My Absence

If you told me back when I was 16 and deeply in love with writing that I’d go out of my way to avoid writing as much as possible at age 36, I’d never have believed it. But here we are, and it’s been almost a year since I wrote anything other than essays for class. It’s not like I haven’t had anything to say. On the contrary, I almost feel like I’ve been hoarding rants. I think the issue is that writing, like so many of my other hobbies, was spoiled for me once it became work. Like, once I started using writing as a means to generate income, I stopped using it as a means to express myself or relieve stress. Maybe I sub-consciously view any activity that produces capital as diametrically opposed to creativity, and I definitely associate work with stress in general. Not that either of those beliefs are necessarily valid on a rational level, but that hasn’t stopped me in the past.

Anyway, I don’t really want to get into a long-winded essay on what I’ve been doing in the past year or devote several paragraphs to navel-gazing musings on why I’ve been avoiding writing/the Internet/social media. I’m gonna take advantage of the popularity of lists on the Internet and just lay out the above-referenced information in bulleted form (minus the navel-gazing):

  1. In 2015 I started college full-time for the first time since I was 16. Yes, I went to college at 16. No, I didn’t graduate (clearly) and a bunch of fuckshit happened, so I really didn’t have any credits to my name when I started back. Now, I only have a year left before I get to transfer to university and I’m pretty stoked about that. My major has changed three (3!) times since 2014. I started as a psych major and quickly switched to being an English major, then I fancied myself a math major, and now I’m leaning towards sociology. I think I’m probably just going to settle on that because I’ll get out of school faster than I would with a STEM major, and I’m old. I need to get back to work so I can never retire.
  2. Because of the aforementioned return to school, I haven’t really had a ton of free time, which means I chose to avoid social media because it’s just a huge time sink and tends to upset me in general. I really can’t with the ignorance that occurs on Facebook, y’all. I can handle Twitter in small doses, but I’ll probably never go back to Facebook or Tumblr. It’s just too much.
  3. I also cut out writing because I had so much homework. I use the past tense because it’s summer now so I’m just getting high and binge-watching Supernatural with the man. I mean, I do productive ish too, but I’m not gonna lie and say 80% of my time isn’t devoted to those two activities or something resembling them.
  4. Since it’s summer, I decided to fire this thing back up and maybe get some writing in. There’s plenty going on to be fired up about right now, what with it being election season. And with America continuing to be the paragon of racist imperialism it always is, I’m entirely set to help fuel the Internet outrage machine.
  5. I’m realizing I can’t sing “This Is How We Do It” and write a coherent post at the same time for some reason.
  6. I think the existence of this list frees me up to write about ish that has nothing to do with my absence. So I’ll be doing that from here on out. Until, of course, there’s another lengthy break between posts, which will require me to produce another list.

P.S. This campaign is giving me life, so I titled this post in its honor. Bruh. BuzzFeed ain’t shit, and they’ve been making money off content aggregation (stealing) forever.

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